Name Drama

We were supposed to meet G today, but when we showed up at our SW's office, he didn't come. She says it's not like him, so he might have forgotten or something is going on. She's going to call and let us know once she talks to him and finds out. But, I'm disappointed because we were excited to meet him. I was going to post about the meeting, but instead I'll write about the naming drama that is going on around here.

First of all, is it or is it not too weird to keep "Beatrix" for a middle name? We just love it so much and love that it means "bringer of joy" because that's exactly how we feel about adopting. But, we can find another name that means something good if it's weird to use it again. Advice?

Second, we are dealing with grandma drama. Not Clio's grandmas, but ours. My maternal grandma is very interested in names and tried to convince my mother to name me Deidre when I was in utero. Obviously, my mother ignored her. The very first phone call with my Grandma about Lucy, back when she was still Clio, yielded the same result. "I think Deidre is a nice name, don't you?" She is so persistent! I expressed to her at that time that we weren't taking suggestions, but she doesn't listen. With this Clio, she was even more pushy and in the very first conversation I had with her she suggested her own name: "Joan." Please. When I laughed off her suggestion, she moved on to pushing "Vanessa." No. Yesterday she called me and suggested "Luanne." !!!

What makes this situation worse is that one of the names we are considering right now is J's maternal grandma's name. This grandma has passed away, but J was very close to her and I got to know her quite well also.

Pros to J's grandma's name:

• Unlike "Joan," her name has a very cute way to shorten it and make it more modern.
• This grandma was such a sweet, wonderful woman and pretty much the archetypal grandmother character. She was very smart and adventurous and we'll have great stories to tell Clio about her namesake.

Cons to J's grandma's name:

• It is old-fashioned, like "Joan," and even though we'll call her the cute shortened version, I've always been told it's a mistake to name a baby something you don't really like and won't call her. For a long time I really liked "Josephine" for a girl so that I could call her "Josie," but I just don't like "Josephine" enough to risk that she'll want to be called that when she's eight, or fourteen, or whenever. The name we are considering is old-fashioned enough that I'm sure many people will cringe when we announce it and ask "what were they thinking?!" I know that shouldn't influence me, but it does. Rest assured, the shortened version is cute and people who don't like it are just wrong. :)
• Grandma Drama! My grandma (the one I wrote about above) will inevitably find out how we chose the name (we're not sure she knows what J's grandma's name was, because they only met once, at the wedding) because it's too big a secret to keep forever, and when she finds out she will be offended. I'm sure of it. On top of that, I have another grandma who passed away several years ago and J has another grandma who is living. I doubt J's living grandma will be offended, but you never know. There's a slight chance that family on my dad's side could be mildly miffed, but the grandma on that side had a very unusual name and I think everyone will understand. I'm really worried about my grandma. She is a "difficult" person and we've all learned that it's in our best interest to keep her happy (I have a long history of failing at this). Deanna and Jen have met her and understand my dilemma. :)

OK, even though I wrote more about the cons, there are still two pros and two cons. Advice, anyone? Thanks!