Monday, April 7, 2008


We have a lawyer! The only other time in my life I've had a lawyer was the time I got a speeding ticket and we hired someone to plead it down to a non-moving violation so that my insurance wouldn't go up. (And, by the way, I really didn't deserve a ticket for going 48 in a 35 because it was a highway for goodness sakes!) The speed limit should have been at least 50...a raised highway with no residential houses on it! OK, I'm calming down now.

Anyhow, J and I met our new lawyer (KR) this afternoon, which consisted of telling her about our adoption plans and then learning the size of her retainer. Wow. If anyone is thinking about adoption and wants to know how much we're paying, feel free to e-mail me. Our lawyer asked how we'd like to pay and we said by check. She then told us that some people like to pay with a credit card in order to get the frequent flier miles. That made me smile; you could practically go to the moon and back with the ff miles this bill would earn!

So, good news first: KR says that this is an "easy" adoption because there are no issues with different counties, states or countries. Also, T being involved and supportive removes some of the big legal concerns. M has Medicaid to cover her healthcare expenses, and she's not asking an unreasonable amount to cover her expenses (we'll reimburse her for prenatal vitamins, maternity clothes, counseling and time off work after Clio is born). So, our adoption should be fairly straight-forward and relatively inexpensive compared to some.

Bad news next: I didn't quite realize all of the legal hoops we have to jump through. Meeting with KR and paying her retainer is only the beginning. We'll have to hash out details with M and T about our birth plan, etc. We will have to get permission from M to see Clio in the hospital for the first 2 days after she's born (although I don't anticipate this will be a big problem). We will have to go to court 48 hours after she's born to get temporary custody, and at that time will have to answer questions from the judge about our fitness to be parents, including a potential pop quiz about transracial adoption. If Clio is born on July 2nd, then 48 hours later will be the 4th and a Friday, meaning in that case we wouldn't have custody until the 7th...5 days later! If that happened, M would have to take Clio home from the hospital and then turn her over to us later. That would stink because M is not going to be prepared to have a baby at home. But, the only other option would be to keep Clio in the hospital the whole time, and I doubt Medicare would pay for that. Our insurance will only cover Clio once she's officially ours. Please, everyone, pray she doesn't come on the 2nd! or any Thursday or Friday, for that matter. Thanks. KR also detailed all of the different social workers etc. who will be visiting our house during the first 6 months, after which the adoption will be finalized. However, M and T only have a right to change their minds during that initial 48 hour period, not for a full 6 months.

OK, deep breathing...I'm alright.

1 comment:

  1. Lots of deep, peaceful breathing....*hugs*

    Having an attorney on your side seems like a great way to make sure you've got a spokesperson. A pricey one, sure, but thank goodness in the end, right?

    I will make it my new dedicated ritual to hope that Clio favors an early-in-the-week delivery. Monday, perhaps? A much nicer day, I think, than its reputation would support. At least for having babies, anyway. =)


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